When I was a kid, my mother would tell me that positive thinking brings about positive things. And, if you told yourself you couldn't do it, then you would inherently set yourself up to have things not work in your favor.
Well, twenty some odd years later that still makes me smile. At the same time, I've found it strangely applicable in my life. If I thought in a positive manner about something and worked towards it, then somehow, things would play out in a positive way. Granted, things like circumstance and chance play into it. But somehow it all unfolds how it should.
Now, today, I find myself thinking about it in the dating context, reflecting on the last few men I've dated and the particular stages I was at my life. When I felt less than great about myself, I tended to date slick, smooth-talking or good looking guys that offered little substance. The thought process here was if someone looked that good, I couldn't be doing all bad, right? Emotions and persona would come later...
On the flip side, when things are working well in my life, I tend to meet confident, ambitious men who have a lot going for them.
Essentially, it was my state of mind that men were picking up on -- is she about herself? Is she confident? Is she needy? Is she too drama filled? These were either turn-ons or turn-offs... And made all the difference between a guy that I would want asking for my number, or a man that thinks he can pull a fast one on me because I'd let him.
What it comes down to is that attitude matters just as much as looks, if not more. I know that I typically prefer men that are put together and sharp... But, if I'm not feeling that way, how can I expect to attract a guy of the same caliber?
Lesson here (that I keep reminding myself) is that once you feel as good as you can about you, only then can you be good for someone else. Besides, wouldn't you want someone getting the best you have to offer?
I know I would.
Image Credit: Michael Roder/PhotoXpress