Monday, January 4, 2010

Lessons From A 52-Week Hunt For "The One"

Just this evening, I came across one story about a woman who gave up her search for love this year, after her one-year aggressive online campaign failed. Apparently, through this very thorough site, she posted weekly videos, kept a daily blog, and even maintained weekly goals, not to mention connected with supporters through various social media channels. In turn, the site garnered press on some A-list media outlets and landed her tons of dates -- but no man of her dreams. Now, she's taking a little sabbatical from the active dating campaign she launched a year ago.

While I thought her way of pursuing it was quite bold, I admire her mentality and approach to all of it: Never giving up hope that maybe, just maybe, if you allow yourself to step out of your comfort zone, you can at least open yourself up to a world of possibilities that restore your faith in dating.

I have to admit... The fact that she opened herself up this way makes me realize that maybe I'm not doing as much as I can... Or at least that I shouldn't cut myself off yet. After all, you never know.

And, this quest also reminded me of one other important thing: that as hard as it is, you can't make any one man responsible for the fault of those before him.

Who knew all that could come from a search like this one?

Image Credit: NewOrleansCVB


  1. I heard about her and surprised that the amount of guys she dated, she didn't find her guy. But despite that, I'm sure she really learned a lot about herself.

    One thing I know I am doing this year is taking chances. That means contacting guys I normally wouldn't (cause I think they may be out of my league) or dating guys I would have possibly brushed off before (who cares if he's only 5'5"? Gulp.) Less than a week into 2010 it's already paying off...but even if it doesn't work out with this new guy, at least I feel less hesitant about getting myself out there more.

    Good luck to you this year--I'll be reading along, hoping you find the guy!

  2. I appreciate your feedback... And you know I'll keep you posted!

  3. First time on your blog and liked your post.

    I followed that story for most of the year, because I was inspired by her 'gumption'. It's sad she didn't meet 'the one', but her story makes it clear that you've got to stay in the game if you want to find love. Unfortunately for the timid among us, the man of our dreams is not going to show up on our doorstep and say 'Here I am'.

    So, I'll be watching your progress as I too work hard at keeping my eye on the prize.

  4. I appreciate your thoughts and I completely agree!

    Thanks and I'll definitely keep your words in mind.

  5. Such a brave thing to do, I agree! Although her year was really intense, it is a reflection on all of our dating ups and downs, and how we can press on despite frustrations about not meeting "the one". I think dating ends up being more about finding yourself through the experience---finding out who you are and what REALLY matters to you. It's a gift in that respect to be single and searching.

  6. Kelly, you make a great point. You know, an old friend once gave me a t-shirt that reads: "Better alone than in poor company!" And it's true. I continue to remind myself that while I search for "the one," it's better that I'm single considering my options than dealing with a loser.

    Although every once in a while I backtrack and get a little weak. But that's all a mindgame.