Sunday, November 8, 2009

The UNassist (Or the Assist Gone Wrong)

Lots of times when I'm out and about, I find that my girls are my best assets. Whether it's dodging a guy or reading his signals, I rely on them to help me get through the night... And maybe, if I'm lucky, getting the attention of a hot new dating prospect.

So, how does this change when it seems that a friend is cock blocking? (Although the term has been normalized into our everyday, you can find the "official" definition at the Urban Dictionary)

I was having Sunday morning brunch with Marisol when this all came up. She was recounting the debauchery from the previous night, when she and her friend Chrissy were out at a party at a trendy downtown bar. The music was great, the drinks were flowing and everyone was having a good time. Soon, a group of guys spotted them, and one of the guys broke the ice, roping Marisol onto the dance floor and being a good wingman by leading her towards his very cute friend. So they hit it off, and the night, according to Marisol was looking good.

As the evening progresses, Chrissy asks Marisol if she needs help, but Marisol tells Chrissy that she could handle this one. After all, she'd already spent the night talking and dancing with him so she's covered.

However, instead of leaving it alone, Chrissy makes it over to Marisol's target and somehow manages to chat him up, eventually taking him out with her when she heads out for a cigarette break.

A short while later, Chrissy comes back and tells Marisol that he left with his friends, but she gave him her own phone number because it was easier and she didn't want to pull out her phone to look for Marisol's number since the two of them were going to be hanging out together anyway.

When I heard this, I had to chuckle to myself. The two of them are quite the pair and they shared a similar partying style, which has brought them close over the last few years -- even after Chrissy once hooked up with a guy Marisol wanted.

To me, this one seems like a difficult one to chew. Hooking up with a guy that I knew a friend wanted is already a no-no. (MAYBE, if she said it's OK, and they hadn't been a real couple, but by and large -- not something I can swing.) However, if a girl offers to hook me up and then not give out my number to the object of my affection when he asks for it... Well, I find it hard to believe that she had my best interest at heart.

Well, maybe she couldn't get to her phone. Maybe it seemed to make sense to just give him her number because that was all she had time to do before he left. I'm not sure. But, if a friend already bagged the object of my affection once, I know I would be wondering whether she's intercepting the call to cock block, either by blowing him off "on my behalf", or trying to bag him herself. And then I'd be wondering how much more often I should rely on her to help land me a date.

In spinning this one around for a bit, this seems to be an AGW -- Assist Gone Wrong. I mean, let's put aside for a second that the guy didn't ask for the number himself (in which case, he's a punk anyway). No, this is a case of whether or not there was some wingwoman action happening, which there didn't seem to be.

What it boils down to? Before going out with your friends, make sure to take a page from the game of basketball and study the makings of a good assist. Everyone may have a slightly different point of view, so better to clear that up than make any major mistakes on the court.

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