I was laying low late last night when one of my best childhood friends, Renee, asked me whether I knew if our mutual friend, Julian, was engaged to be married. I was immediately surprised, and took to hopping on the ever popular Facebook to find out. Immediately, I noticed there were tons of messages on his Wall from his frat brothers extending their well wishes... And then there was no mistaking he'd taken the plunge, which left me dumbfounded.
Don't misunderstand -- I'm totally happy for him. How can I not be? I've known him more than half our lives, and he deserves to have that kind of love in his life. But, I would be lying if I said I saw it coming, because I didn't. However, something must have clicked for him and the decision was made. Just like that.
Now that I've entered my late 20s, I've seen this happen with tons of my friends and especially the guys in my life who have met that one woman that makes them want to put their single ways aside. They start off perfectly content being footloose and fancy-free. Then there's that one woman that just does it and case closed -- he's sprung.
I'm getting tons of wedding invitations from various friends, all with interesting stories but all ending the same way: the guy decides he can't live without this woman. Even my brother, the ultimate playboy, managed to settle down and not give it a second thought when he found his wife.
The speed and certainty with which my friends are entering this stage of their lives leads me to understand one simple (and obvious) truth: when a man had found the one, he's willing to become the Marrying Kind. No games needed. How he gets to that point is on him, but when he wants to settle down, he will. He gets over his issues and hang-ups... He doesn't disappear... And, he grows up if it means it's going to keep that woman by his side.
This is actually kind of comforting -- it means the games need to stop sooner or later.